I was visiting school on Friday, the 16th of April. I was wearing a checkered black T-shirt, and it was lunchtime. I was walking away from the cafeteria. I didn't have money, nor did my swipecard work anymore so I did not have anything to eat. My best friend Suka had been in school, but she left after 3rd period to go for a advertising photoshoot for the ice cream Cornetto. Lauren O. was in front of me, she had gotten up from the cafeteria table a minute earlier because she had wanted to print out her Drama presentation notes. As I was passing the library, my phone vibrated in my shorts pocket. I remember feeling undisturbed and mellow before taking that faithful phone call. I answered. It was Suka.
"Paige..." she said. She sounded hesitant, and the line was quiet. I strained to hear her. "I think I'm seriously about to cry..." her voice was shaky. My first impression was that the people over there were giving her a hard time. So I asked her, in the best reassuring tone I could manage. "What's wrong?"
And she told me. I was unsure on how to react. I thought she was joking... but she wasn't.
"Karyn passed away,".
It took a while for it to sink in. I broke down while I was still on the phone with her. I repeatedly asked her "How did this happen?" in exasperation. She didn't know, and she begged me not to cry. Lauren heard my frantic cries and turned around. Her face was immediately drenched with concern. "Paige... Oh my God, what's the matter?" she asked me. I was unable to speak, so I impulsely thrust my phone into her hands, with Suka still on the line.
I then watched Lauren talk, trying to understand the situation. Moments after, she knew... and she put her hand to her mouth in shock. The Hoed twins were close by, and they saw the commotion. They asked us what was wrong, and we told them. Suka asked us to keep it quiet, but the news eventually spread like wildfire anyway. Mr. Derby-Crook, the principle, had called for an emergency assembly to announce the news. The Year 11's walked in, most of them with confused expressions on their faces. "Oh God, something must've happened..." I overheard one of them say. Some of them had walked in laughing, but promptly stopped after seeing half the audience sniffing and in tears.
Mostly, I didn't understand. I couldn't understand how she was absolutely fine on Monday, which was the first and last time I saw her when I visited school for the first time that week. She had tackled me full on with a hug, and I lifted her off her feet. She had been excited that I was in town. I took her for granted that day. I spent probably less than 10 minutes with her. I didn't know.
I had no idea.
That very Friday, she was meant to come home with me back to my apartment for a weekend-long sleepover. We had planned this for weeks. Thursday night, she was texting Suka about the next day. We planned on going out clubbing for Josh's birthday party on the 17th. Majority of Year 10 were going, and she agreed to go too. Even the football match on Saturday was on the agenda. That match was eventually dedicated to her. We won 1-0.
Karyn had died from cardiac arrest early on Friday morning. She wasn't in school for the last two days because her throat had been feeling sore. Her father had only left her alone for a bit, and when he came back, she wasn't breathing.
I didn't get a chance to see her afterwards, because she was due on a flight to Singapore the very next morning for her funeral.
Everyone cancelled their Friday night plans in respect for her.
Yesterday, my Dad found her obituary in the Singaporean Straits Times, and saved it for me.
and I will always.
